Making Bank

There's a pay czar in the nation's capitol, and he's cutting pay for executives of companies bailed out by the Federal Government. Not down to anywhere near the level you and I make mind you, but significant nonetheless.

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I really don't have a problem with top executives making what some call obscene levels of compensation. Big companies employ thousands--tens of thousands even. They pay for the majority of health care for employees, their spouses and their children. They multiply money through investing, they pay big taxes and they fulfill social obligations by donating large sums of money to charities. If a handful of top executives grow the company and earn billions, then I have no problem if they earn tens of millions.

That's just my opinion, and I respect anyone who feels differently.

What I do have a problem with are the silly warnings issued by the companies hit by the pay czar. Large corporations typically justify huge compensation by claiming that other companies will raid them--stealing their top talent if they're not allowed to keep them very, very happy. In a Bloomberg.com article, Bank of America spokesman Scott Silvestri says, “Competitors not subject to the pay restrictions already are exploiting the situation by identifying our top performers and using pay concerns to recruit them away for fair-market compensation.”

I don't buy it.

If an organization is so great, then it's stocked with high-potential managers right down the chain. If the manager in the number four peg leaves for greener pastures, then the five-peg person can slide in without a problem. Not only can executives and managers move up the ranks to fill voids; but with all due respect to the chief officers out there, I believe there are plenty of junior executives--in organizations large and small--who could step up to the plate and knock one out.

The argument, "You better pay our managers gross amounts or someone else will, and our company will suffer" just doesn't hold water. So suck it up, Bank of America.

Grounded

I'm guessing little hide-and-go-seek Falcon--of Colorado ballooning fame--will get a pass from his parents, despite all the trouble his "I'll show them" pouting caused. But one has to wonder if those same parents will be so lucky when it comes to footing the bill for the rescue efforts. They're probably off the hook; otherwise, the father, who looks like he may have watched w-a-y too much Jetsons when he was a kid, will have to sell a few of those "flying cars."

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UPDATE

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Well... I guess we know how this story ended. Interesting that the wanna-be-TV-star father has collaborated with ex-WRGB wanna-be-meteorologist Scott Stevens.

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Many people are admonishing Richard Heene, saying he's exploited his children for his own personal gain; although, I'm wondering if he didn't want his children to be part of that gain as well. So perhaps his intentions are good, but his methods are grossly misguided. And you haven't seen the last of Mr. Heene on TV. With a slew of cable channels producing low-cost reality shows, he'll pop up soon enough, because our society rewards crooks by watching the shows that pay them.

Magic

The Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome. The sports arena that's so bad, nobody wants to sponsor it (even the Knickerbocker Arena got Pepsi and the Times Union to pony up cash). But is it magical? Magical for washed-up professional athletes who come to Minnesota? Let's look at the evidence.

1991 Jack Morris - Wins his 200th game on three days rest, with 30 minutes sleep and suffering from the flu. More notably, pitches a 10-inning shut out to win Game 7 of the World Series, which brings Twins Manager Tom Kelly to tears after the game.

1993 Jim McMahon - After a so-so regular season, wins final three games for the Vikings to get them into the playoffs.

1998 Randall Cunningham - Rides the coattails of Randy Moss, helping the Vikings put up a record 556 points and a 15-1 record.

1999 Jeff George - Lights it up in the air for a 10-6 record and a trip to the playoffs, losing to the eventual Super Bowl champions.

2009 Brett Favre -

Despite having a superstar running back, a solid defense, and a kick return threat, one wonders if Brett Favre can help the Vikings get into the playoffs. He's about to turn 40 and it's a long season. He should be retired but he can't give it up. He'll try to do too much with sore muscles and start throwing more interceptions. He'll fade down the stretch.

-OR-

The Metrodome is magical and Favre will help them get to the playoffs. Heck, they're already 3-0. Make that 4-0... the Packers historically have bad fortune at the Metrodome. Magic. At least for one play this week, Brett Favre was 27 again, firing the ball into the end zone at a spot only the receiver could catch it. On a play that's supposed to end as a Hail Mary, Favre completed a legitimate pass. Maybe he'll get the the flu and pass for 300 yards next week against his old team.

Thanks for Nothing, Reuters

Reuters ran a story that leads with, “Washington, DC has become the favorite area for wealthy young adults, with the nation's highest percentage of 25-34 year-olds making more than $100,000 a year…”

Huh? It’s not that young adults making over six figures are flocking to Washington, DC, it’s that—and listen carefully, Reuters—young professionals with good jobs in DC are paid more because it’s expensive to live there. Let’s say Sandy makes $105,200 working in Bethesda, MD (I know... technically not DC). Guess what her job would pay in Indianapolis. Reuters? Wanna guess? Not $105,200. And Sally isn’t exactly living the high life on that salary, whereas in Indianapolis she’d have a nice house, an Audi A6 and a kitchen pantry overflowing with food. Somebody needs to explain to the author of the Reuters article the difference between income and discretionary income. I'll debate Reuters about Sally being wealthy.

Here’s some more information from the article. Behind Washington DC on the list are a suburban county of DC (Arlington County), San Francisco and Manhattan. Shocking! Who would have guessed that young adults that live in these places make more money than those who live in, say, St. Louis?

Apologizing in the 21st Century

Since when did an apology stop meaning, "I'm sorry for what I did" and start meaning, "forget about what I did?" It all seemed to start with The Sheriff of Wall Street's, "sorry I got caught... I'm out of here" apology; although for what it's worth, I believe he's now sorry he let so many people down, most notably his family.

But at least Mr. Spitzer's apology had some sincerity to it. Recent apologies in the news don't carry as much--if any--weight. First there's Mark Sanford. This whole story is still unbelievable to me, especially his, "I disappeared because I was having an affair, blah blah blah. Now, it's back to business as usual, so get over it" apology.

Then there's Chris "beat-a-woman-and-stay-quiet-for-23-weeks-then-apologize" Brown. Despite apparently apologizing many times to Rihanna during that time span, a faster turn-around on the public apology would have helped the sincerity factor. Chris will turn drinking-age on May 5th, 2010. Imagine what he'll be like with a little booze in him. Watch out!

And more recently, there's been a barrage of, "I'm sorry (whatever)" apologies. I don't believe Joe Wilson is sorry at all for calling our President a liar, but I'm glad he did, because the aftermath has been entertaining, starting with the look on Nancy Pelosi's face and ending with the chastisement from his peers (like they're such righteous superheroes). Mr. Wilson apologized once, but as of this writing, refuses to apologize a second time. Next is Serena Williams and her, "I was in the competitive zone. Nah, I guess I'm sorry" apology. Finally there's Kanye West, who Barack Obama apparently called a jackass for his actions at the MTV Video Music Awards. Kanye apologized. Whatever.

And we're still waiting for CNN to apologize for their crack reporting on Coast Guard training exercises.

So you see, you can now behave pretty much any way you want, because an apology leads to immediate and absolute exoneration.